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Why I calendar times to call my friends

May 14, 2020

I’m Kelly Nolan.
I'm an attorney who'd been decently organized through law school but got quickly overwhelmed as a actual attorney. After nothing else worked for me, I created this system – and kept on practicing law. Years later, I found out others were interested in learning it, so that's what I do now! Let's get this realistic system in your hands so you can start living a life that feels more calm, doable, and that lights you up.
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I have reminders to call friends in my calendar.

Before you mentally lay into me thinking that’s too weird, give me a chance to explain.

I WANT to call my friends. This isn’t a chore or something I HAVE to schedule or I won’t do.

But I also don’t use my calendar just for chores or the things I “have” to do.

I use it to help me design and live out the life I want.

To show up in the way that I want.

To make time for and help me do the things I want to do.

While I want to call friends, I often think about calling them when the timing isn’t great – when the time zone difference means they’re mid-dinner while I’m on my afternoon walk with my girls.

Or I’ll suddenly realize it’s been a solid two weeks/months since we spoke.

I figured this out when a friend was going through a rough patch, and I wanted to be there for her.

I put in my calendar “Call [friend]” every 3 days during my morning walk (when the timing worked for both of us and I could actually call bc my toddler was strapped into a stroller).

And it was awesome. I got to talk to my friend more often. She got to feel supported. And my brain didn’t need to be the one to remember to call her or think through when we last spoke.

So, I started doing it with more people. Not at that frequency necessarily – some once a week, some once a month.

And I’m flexible with it. When the alert goes off, if I’m not in the mood or we spoke yesterday (because yes – I talk to people outside of these scheduled times haha), I’ll snooze it for a day or ignore the alert entirely.

The reminders just helps me make it happen more often than it would without them. And that’s what I want. It’s that simple.

You may not struggle to show up for friends / get to laugh with them as much as you want like I do.

But is there something you WANT to do but just keep forgetting to do when the timing is right? Could you use your calendar to help you get to do it more often.

My time management program goes through other strategies like this one to help you stay on top of what you need to do.

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